February 26, 2007

• Ever feel like you’re on a see-saw?

   

  Merry Go Round?

   

  Yep me too.

   

   

  Dylan figured out how to open his bottles. I have changed bed clothes twice before I figured out he was actually opening them.

  9 months old!!

  
  Dwayne left yesterday for training in Nashville TN for his new job.

  He was excited to go but also very nervous about leaving us behind. He ran through all of the safety tips before he left, the house alarm, he brought out the berretta to show me how to use it. Fun.

  I told him not to worry, my little-big Brother is just down the street.

   

  Our camera is broken, so we have no pics. I have to send it back to the manufacturer.

   

  My Sister got married on Thursday last week. http://profile.myspace.com/index.cfm?fuseaction=user.viewprofile&friendid=65020861&MyToken=031de30f-e606-4d64-8a77-b35a56b5be82

   

  I spent 8 hours putting together the best “getting married” advice/insight I could develop. I am the big sister, what else am I suppose to do?

  I took care to be sure to only provide *information* about abusive relationships, addiction and divorce. I mainly focused on the steps and questions that I asked myself to make the decision for me. In the last paragraph, I told her she deserved more, that she should not marry so soon, that she should wait a while. I guess it was not heard, not welcomed, not worthy of mention. Maybe, I wasn’t so nice to her. She never replied to the message. Instead she acted as if it never existed; no mention of it what so ever. I was mad.

  So then, the day before her wedding day she writes to me, telling me how excited she is. And being very irritated at her dismissal of my hard worked letter, I responded without thinking…I wrote back : “I’m sorry”.  That wasn’t good enough, so I called her and really laid out my opinion to her voice mail, recorded for evermore… it wasn’t pretty.

  I felt like an ASS, but I don’t think she has chosen wisely. I know it is not my life, it is not my call. I simply think she deserves better than whom she settled for.

  I did not give her this opinion until the day before she married. I didn’t go to the wedding. Our last conversation ended with her saying a bunch of F-U’s so I guess I lost a sister. We never had a really close relationship, she is 8 years my junior. I am so pissed that she would choose a life like our parents led. It is so sad. I really hope that they do better than my folks did, or don’t bring kids into the relationship. There was a lot pain and suffering when I was growing up as a result of my parents choices. I just really hope she is smarter. I am glad I live 500 miles away so I don’t have to watch.

   

  I think I have successfully crushed any hope of a relationship with my sister.

  I am an over achiever, that is what I do.

   

  • 11:30 am
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